I CAN'T EVEN. The internet is going to be the death of me. It seems like there is always some new "controversy" rolling around. I try to stay out of things but sometimes I get sucked into it all. And it isn't like people have "discussions" for free exchange. Mostly, I get into a situation of holding myself back, until I just can't any more and then I type something. And maybe it is something that needs to be said, or maybe not. I don't know, but I know that I've reached my limit.
I can't imagine how public figures manage it. Picture yourself tired, after a long work week, so you sit down with your phone in your hand, and after reading a few things, you click on something and respond -- and for the next week your PR department is issuing apologies. I'm glad I'm not a public figure. I screw up a lot.
I've got odd quirks, too. I get really nervous sometimes, and lose my ability to speak. If I am intimidated by someone I seem to say the dumbest things. I once told a particularly intimidating boss, (who had a British accent - doubling the intimidation factor) "Hey, the rain is really wet today, huh?" Seriously. I said that. Out loud. Maybe you are cool all the time. I'm not. I'm really geeky sometimes, and don't really do well at parties unless it's with my homies. (See, that sentence back there. Nerd - all the way, right?)
I'd like to think I'm cool. I'm not. My worst nervous habit though, is that when I get really overwhelmed, I laugh. In fact, when The Husband proposed to me that is exactly what I did. I laughed. I laughed a lot. Eventually, he said, "You are kind of making me nervous now, and maybe hurting my feelings a little." Yes, that is how our true love story began. Him - sweet and earnest, and me - awkward and laughing. The Girl suffers from the same nervous malady -- except she cries when she gets overwhelmed. Sobbing is probably a better description. She's part of leadership at her school, and every time she has to speak in public, she cries her way through it.
Of all the things to pass on to the next generation . . .
I'm feeling the Friday, groove, though. In my younger years, it was a stay up late, and have fun watching videos, hanging out with friends, or playing video games. Now, it is a fabulous opportunity to crawl into bed kind of early, and "watch" tv -- with my eyes closed. I'm old now. One thing has stayed the same though: Gloriously, perfect Sleep-in Saturday. The Offspring are finally old enough to stay in bed past 6 a.m. It is lovely. Sometimes I have to roust them out of bed around 10! I'm just trying to give some hope to all the Moms of the littles - eventually they sleep.
Which reminds me, The Boy has crawled into bed with us almost every night since birth. He likes to be around humans. He will snuggle right up against you. It is adorable and far to crowded. The last three nights, however, he has slept in his own bed. Usually, he crawls in with us around 4:30 a.m., but he hasn't done it in a while. I asked him about it, and this is what he said. I'm not making this up. "Well, when I was 6, I made a commitment that when I was 9 1/2 it was time to sleep in my own bed. So. I guess it's time." He says the craziest stuff. On the drive to school the other morning, when I was far more awake and chipper than he and his sister, he turned to me and said, "Mom, we gotta get you on decaf."
I'm drinking decaf right now, even though it is 10 at night. I love a good cup of coffee in the evening, but thought better of a cup of regular. Imagine, how much today's 500 would ramble if it were ACTUAL caffeine in this cup!
Have an excellent Friday night. Be careful out there, and come back home safe and sound. We need you.